Do you exist?

Do you exist? 

Have you ever felt neglected? Sometimes, I think I never exist in this tiny world I'm rat racing with.  The first few months in Da Nang, I was glad students especially some staffs were very accommodating.  For instance, Ms. Han takes me to Le Duan Street for shopping, and Ms Oanh for traditional Vietnamese bounty meals.  Until one day I woke up being betrayed by a colleague...so I was sent to  Ha Noi.  To make the story short, I never had pleasing and winning experiences in the first two years, and all I could do was cry with grudges for each tear.  But these made me a lot stronger. At work, I always feel like I never exist...to the extent that no matter how many times do I have to nudge them to send me emails in English, they never do. It always comes to the point of losing my patience as they never seem to care. Once I get bad students' feedback most likely they make me feel how dumb I am..but never taps my back for jobs well done.  I doubt if these seniors are well-trained in managing subordinates. Whenever I ask them something, they always think I am complaining.  Well, I find it difficult to ask for personal favors because chances are they see it as demanding the "impossible". So where would I stand? I'm burnt! Though I am really exhausted, I just make myself happy with the little things around me wandering around landscapes which give me life. 

          

   

The country is beautiful, but remember that once you deligate yourself in a job here, you're just like a lemon once squeezed will find yourself in the trash bin. I won't be one of those poor lemons out there pathetic!